Some Days I Wonder...

Is it wrong to think that

Maybe the ways of God isn't as clear cut as some people seem to think?

There's your do's an your do not's.

But is that all there is?

Or is there more to God that needs to be learned?
And isn't there a learning process?
Is all he is, is do's and don'ts?
I thought that he was this almighty being, that you're suppose to believe in even if you can't see him.
Is he just a ruler that has all these rules that you must follow, isn't there more to it then just rules?
Isn't there a relationship to be made there?
Is a relationship with God, like an actual relationship that you would have with a person, and you have to learn from him?
Or is it just you have to follow the rules, cause they are there to be followed, like a commander or something?

And who exactly can I talk to about it? My mother? I've grown up with her views on God, and Religion and Church?
Do you just find God in church? OR is he with you every day?
Do you have to go to a church to really know God?

No I'm not saying going to church is a bad thing, and may be something I may look into in the future.
But can you know HIM outside of church?
If you study your bible, and talk to others about it.
Maybe even find somebody that's more knowing in the subject then you are right now, to talk to about things? Questions, thoughts, stuff you want to learn about.

I'm so lost, and have so many questions. And the one person I thought that I could talk to about it, I'm not sure I can, because we have different views on church.

Am I not a christian because I don't go to church?

It Seems Like...

No matter what you have to find something to complain about. Did we get asked if it was okay that they come here?
No you asked my brother. Yeah most of it is in his name, but do you realize that he don't own, all of it? That they do too.. Even though it's not said as much, and that's also why people think that this isn't their home. It is.
Maybe you should of thought of asking them to. Yet you can't. Because it is not in you to do so..
Hovering? Really? Come on now.
You don't see me?? Why should you see me, what point of it is for you to see me, it's not like it does any good, no matter what you start drama, and somehow I get blamed for "starting" it.
You don't see me because I can not stand you, I can not stand who you are, how you treat certain people. And I really can not stand what you turned my other brother into. If I could hate you I would, but that is to harsh of a word, so I "STRONGLY" dislike you.
You're the one that dropped them off, here and you hardly ever see them. Barely coming over before work. Granted yesterday you did actually come over a couple hours early to spend time with them, so I will give you that small thing.
But since they've been at our house, how much time have you really spent with them? Not much at all.. Has my brother? Considering she is his grandmother in law. No he's been out with his brother in law shooting.
You come home, barely eat dinner and spend time with them. And then as soon as that's over, you're off to the trailer, like they ain't even here.
Your own grandmother fell asleep in the chair, WAITING ON YOU.
Hovering? I think not, at least somebody's willing to take care of YOUR company.

So take your complaining self somewhere else, because we're sick of hearing it.